They always come back, don’t they ladies? That one that you were crazy about but he took you for granted?
There was this guy that could do no wrong. I was sooooo into him. I would change my plans for him at the drop of a dime. And when I say drop -he made sure that it was last minute. But I didn’t care. He was all that I cared about and for some strange reason, I had hopes that we would be together some day. So whatever I could do to secure my spot, I was down.
I left out the part that he didn’t treat me like he should. In his defense, he could only treat me as he knew how to treat me. I corrected a few things along the way like-Him taking me on an actual date, opening doors for me, walking on the outside and ordering my food at fancy restaurants. Although I know how I should be treated, I looked over things that I wouldn’t normally look over with other guys.
Starting out he was great. We went on regular casual dates, we talked all night and we spent quality time together as you should starting a friendship. The chemistry was magical..but not instant to make me give it up immediately. I was sure to guard my heart, knowing that he was the type of guy that I normally fall for.
Once he became comfortable with me and more acquainted with his new city (more heauxs), things began to change. He wasn't from Cincinnati and I was one of the first people he met upon moving here. I allowed him time to get familiar with his surroundings but at the same time offered assistance where I could. I've moved from Cincinnati twice without knowing anyone in those cities so I know how stressful it could be.
At first, it was ok that I was just an option. After all we were just dating and getting to know each other so neither one of us put all of our eggs in one basket. I didn’t sleep with anyone else but I was actively dating and so was he.
This went on for two years 🤦🏽♀️. I know, I know. Before I knew it, I had become so submissive to this man.
There were times where I had full weekends planned and he would call on a Thursday and expected me to be at his game in another city that same weekend. It was never a question, just more of letting me know the arrangements.
I wasn’t a pushover by far, but somehow he had the power to make me forget about anything else I had going on at the time. And besides, we always had a good time...ok that was a lie.
There were times that I felt like I wasn’t there. Like I didn’t matter and that I was just someone there because I wouldn’t let go. They never stop messing with you as long as you allow them to be there.
Welp, the day comes that he is cut from his job. Horrible for him but what a relief for me. Here is your chance to move on and not worry about hearing shit about him and girls within your same city. Wondering if you two will be at the same club and he’s with another girl Or worse-you’re not invited to the company events and you Know the dates and times they will occur. Looking back I cringe-what a horrible period to experience.
Well fast forward to present tense....You two are still social media friends...and you message each other here and there. Yes I’m looking good (Lol) and he finds work elsewhere. Nothing guaranteed-maybe a year contract. Of course you’re still there for him. During his difficult times (There were so many of those), you have Always been there to console him.
Now it’s 1.5-2 years later and he messaged you to tell you that you will see him very soon.
Me: How soon?
Grrrr. Typical Shit.
At first you’re like-Oh shit! I can’t wait. But once reality hits, you're hesitant to reconnect due to a few reasons.
I don’t want to resuscitate old feelings. Old feelings that were not good to you previously knowing his power over your feelings.
And knowing you want more out of a relationship, he will not give you what you want.
And more importantly, you don’t know where his ding-dong has been. Generally, guys that you have previously been with expect the ”same action” as they had before. So now you have to have the conversation of when the last time they were tested. Of course they will say August (🙄) but if you want the written results, someone is bound to become offended.
Not to mention, he didn’t give a date or time so you may already have plans that weekend.
Part of me says-just relax and go with the flow..change your plans if you have any.
But 90% of me says -🗣Fuuuuuck that. Just stay focused on things you have in motion and be weary of the distraction.
Man...imagine how much we could accomplish if we redirect the wrong energy into energy that could elevate our dreams and desires.
I hope he doesn't read my blog,lol.